Perfectionist Disappointed

Before I start this post I need to say;

Yes, it is my fault.

I'm the one in our family who Payton has picked up his perfectionist tendencies from. I accept that. And I love him for it. Even if it's disappointing when you don't live up to what goals you believe you can achieve.

The week before Thanksgiving, Payton's school sent home notes telling the parents if their child was going to receive an award for the grading period at an assembly the following week. I knew he would be getting a "perfect attendance" award, but I didn't know about the other two. The other awards were for "moral focus" (basically well behaved, courteous, responsible children) and the "Principal's award" for the most "well rounded" child from each class. Only one would be given per class. I figured he may be getting one of those as well and maybe both...but I wasn't 100% sure. None the less, I didn't mention to him that he would be getting ANY award.

So the time of the award ceremony comes and Payton is called for the Perfect Attendance award and then the Moral Focus award! I was so happy!!

And I knew he was one of two in contention for the Principal's Award. So at the end, when the time came, I got close to the front to take a picture regardless of who won. Payton's name wasn't called, but the little girl who did get the award is a friend of his, so he was happy...at first.

But by the end of the ceremony, I could tell from the bleachers that he wasn't happy about something. Sure enough, I got down there and found him sobbing. He was "very, very, very sad" that he didn't get the Principal's Award. I told him there were more turns and he may get it next time. His teacher, Mrs. McCoy, came over and realized what was going on and she told him that she was sure he would get it one of these times soon. I told him that we'd just have to keep trying.

That's when he about killed me with what he said. Warning: This comment will break your heart!

"But Mommy, I don't think I can trying any harder. I'm trying as hard as I can!!!"

Ohhh. My heart breaks again just typing that. We were able to appease him after school with some ice cream from Baskin Robbins. But I'm praying he gets that Principal's Award next time. I can't handle that again!!!